The real glory of meditation lies not in any method but in its continual living experience of presence, in its bliss, clarity, peace… During meditation, we experience clarity, peace, and joy, instead of drowsiness and distraction. …and, most important of all, complete absence of grasping.
We are not attached to these experiences; instead, we maintain a state of mindful awareness. Even though you experience clarity, you are not immersed in clarity; even though you experience peace, you are not immersed in peace either. Instead, you stay mindful. The diminishing of grasping in yourself is a sign that you are becoming freer of yourself. And the more you experience this freedom, the clearer the sign that the ego and the hopes (desires) and fears that keep it alive are dissolving, and the closer you will come to the infinitely generous “wisdom that realizes egolessness.” Your attachment to the ego is gradually loosening. Although ego still occasionally appears, your attachment starts to have gaps. Previously, your ego-grasping was constant, without gaps, and strong. Now, although your ego-grasping is still there, it is no longer constant, but rather has gaps in between. Although your ego-grasping is still there, it’s not as strong and insurmountable as before. Now, with just a little effort, the wisdom of egolessness can arise — once you make a slight mental effort, you can experience the egoless state. Sometimes, you can even abide in the egoless state for a little while. However, the ego-grasping will reemerge, and then you can meditate again. Gradually, you will “come to the infinitely generous wisdom that realizes egolessness.” When you live in that wisdom home, you’ll no longer find a barrier between “I” and “you,” “this” and “that,” “inside” and “outside”; you’ll have come, finally, to your true home, the state of nonduality. When you are in an egoless state, your mind has no sense of opposition toward all external phenomena and the five aggregates, including the five aggregates of other sentient beings. Previously, you were bound by the notion of “I,” followed with the notion of “mine,” leading to a strong sense of opposition. Now that you are egoless, the notions of “I” and “mine” are gone, thus the opposition is gone — non-opposition is non-duality. “Duality” means opposition — inside and outside, you and me, this and that. We are strongly attached to the notions of “you” and “I.” Despite talking about the wisdom of egolessness every day, in daily life, we are still strongly attached to the notions of “you” and “I.” With just a slight lack of mindfulness, you may start to firmly cling to “you,” “I,” and “mine.” Therefore, it’s very difficult to transcend from one who practices virtue to one who pursues liberation. This process is really hard.